Tuesday, June 21, 2005



"Don't be afraid if things seem difficult in the beginning. That's only the initial impression. The important thing is not to retreat. You have to master yourself."

Olga Korbut, Olympic Champion


Monday, June 13, 2005


Allow for intuition

"...you don't just need more intuition, you need better intuition..."
Executive EQ - Emotional Intelligence in Leadership and Organizations
Cooper & Sawaf

One of the surest way to learn to hear your intuitive voice, is to allow time at the beginning of the day, before life takes over, to write down whatever comes to mind. Julie Cameron, author of the Artist's Way recommends writing three pages every morning - just writing, even if at first all you can think about is, "This is silly", "I have nothing to say", "I am not a writer", and whatever else your internal fears are saying.

The only condition is to write EVERYTHING that comes to your mind, about work and about the rest of your life. Being radically emotionally honest with yourself, about it all. Ideally, you will keep your writing and review it weekly, but if this prevents you to write everything because of fear that someone may read it, then just write, read what you've just written and shred.

Coaching challenge:
Commit to writing your three pages every morning for a month, O.K., commit for a week if one month seems too much of a commitment. Then evaluate whether it has increased your ability to hear that inner voice of intuition.

Your coach
Margurite Tennier


Thursday, June 09, 2005



"Meaning is not something you stumble across, like the answer to a riddle... Meaning is something you build into your life. You build it out of your own past, out of your affections and loyalties... out of the values for which you are willing to sacrifice something....The ingredients are there. You are the only one who can put them together into that unique pattern that will be your life. Let it be a life that has dignity and meaning for you."

John Gardner, professor at Stanford, as quoted in: Executive EQ: Emotional Intelligence in Leadership and Organizations, Robert K. Cooper, Ph.D., and Ayman Sawaf

Are you searching for meaning? In some ways, consciously or not, all human beings are turning toward the light, or what we often mistakenly see as the light. We don't have to improve who we are, we just have to accept the reality of who we are and decide what we can do with the lemons that life has given us, because those lemons have shaped us into a unique being with a 100% unique flavour. Let the world know this awesome flavour called "you". Don't use artificial sweeteners to produce a bland copy of someone else. Just find the best recipe for the ingredients you possess.

Coaching challenge: What are some of the lemons of your past that you have worked hard at ignoring or hiding? Look at some the creative and positive ways other people with similar lemons have put their mark on the world. Come up with 3 ways you can make those lemons into the most memorable lemonade that will give meaning to your life.

Your coach
Marguerite Tennier, M.A


Wednesday, June 01, 2005


Conflict and EI

"If your heart could speak, what emotion would it express?"
Author unknown

Those of you who subscribe to my ezine have received the latest one, about Conflict and Emotional Intelligence.

I believe that the avoidance of conflict in relationships is possibly the biggest cause of divorce and separation, loneliness and misery. Wow! I feel strongly about this one. I must admit that I have been guilty of this in my past relationships - so I speak from experience. Avoiding conflict (i.e.pushing the issue under the carpet) gives short term gain but causes long term pain. The stress of walking on eggshells around someone is detrimental to that particular relationship because you are not being yourself, it's detrimental to your health because of the stress you impose on your system and all this stuff will spill over to the rest of your life.

If you are able to deal constructively with conflict in one area of your life, it means you have the skills. The reason you may not do the same in personal relationships has more to do with how you perceive the conflict as being a threat to your emotional safety instead of looking at the potential positive side of being honest.

Coaching challenge: Where do you avoid conflict? If there is a pattern to your avoidance, list the consequences you are hoping to avoid. How satisfying is that area of your life? Then review your history and evaluate whether those beliefs and behaviours have given you the desired outcome (more love, more emotional intimacy and safety). Finally, make a plan to start making small steps with your loved ones to take small risks to listen to what your soul and your heart really want.

Your coach
Marguerite Tennier


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